Untitled

romulusthread:

MY MATH TEACHER SAW ME TEXTING AND MADE ME STAND IN FRONT OF THE ROOM AND HE TOLD ME TO READ THE TEXTS BUT I WOULNT SO HE TOOK MY PHONE AND READ THE LAST THREE ON THERE OUT LOUD AND THE FIRST ONE WAS “IM HUNGRY” AND MY FRIEND REPLIED WITH “HUNGRY FOR SEMEN” AND I SAID “TRUE THOUGH” IMGONNA JUMP OFF A BUILDING

tardisity:

The oldest person alive was born on April 19, 1897, meaning that April 18th, 1897 was approximately the last time the Earth was inhabited by an entirely different set of people and if you don’t think that’s the realist shit ever then you can get right on outta town.

When my skinny friend says she’s feeling fat
When your jam comes on in the car.
onlylolgifs:

Woman fails at boiling live crabs

onlylolgifs:

Woman fails at boiling live crabs

snorlaxatives:

jamie lynn spears better hope i don’t catch her ass on the streets she’s dead to me for getting zoey 101 cancelled

when you change your answer in a test only to find out later that your first answer was right